Jan Marsh

We wish each other a peaceful and happy Christmas and for many it will be. Family gatherings, shared food and presents, laughter and fun. Beach picnics are being planned. But the lead up is already getting stressful. On a minor personal level I have caused and been the victim of

Ever noticed how the one thing that didn't go as well as you would have liked stands out above everything else in the day? How easy it is to keep on kicking yourself for that double booking, that ill-judged joke! To maintain a buoyant attitude in the face

Once again the early birds are waking me with their calls. I can feel the change happening as I'm more ready to get up these mornings and less likely to huddle under the duvets (yes, two in winter!) resisting the sharp bite of a frosty morning. A pair

What makes you glad to be alive? Six Friends gathered on a winter's night to discuss Gratitude. As we talked, we saw Gratitude as much more than whistling in the dark or taking a Pollyanna-ish look on the bright side. Without Gratitude it would be hard to sustain

Behind the door in the changing room at the pool is a neatly printed inscription: "I was having the worst day until you said Hi". The way the painter has gone round it rather than try to obliterate it makes it even more charming. I can't

The sea swim season has ended. No more gathering at the yacht club on a Thursday evening with an anxious knot in my gut, wondering whether I can get round the course among the other swimmers. Susan suggests a gentle swim at the beach after work, in the last remaining

Saradha arrives from Wellington, queasy from a rough landing. She steadies up over breakfast and we set off for Golden Bay. On the Hill a queue of traffic is at a standstill and a policeman tells us there's a tree down but we can get past it. We

Anis Ibrahim, the Five Foot Traveller, writes about the dérive, a French term meaning drift. We do it when we stroll about a new town, often lost and hoping to be found again, seeing the streets with the fresh eyes of a tourist. I'm delighted to have a

Inspired by Sarah Kay - watch her TED talk or other videos of her spoken word poetry. 10 things I should have learned by now: 1. It's not always my fault. 2. Learning anything worthwhile will involve failure. 3. My friends still care about me - might even

Today I bought myself a picture book. Duck, Death and the Tulip by Wolf Erlbruch has drawn me in with its gentle story and original illustrations. Duck is initially startled to find that Death has been following her around 'just in case'. While Death himself means her no

In 1977 I bought a one-way ticket to Bali. I landed around midnight in a thunderstorm and woke the next morning as if I'd stepped into a fairytale. The jewelled toad in the bathroom, the little bananas and the thermos of tea by my door for breakfast, the

A recent article defines a placebo as a 'therapeutically ineffective treatment used to deceive a subject'. It's the standard against which treatments are scientifically measured for effectiveness. But far from being ineffective, placebos often have very clear therapeutic effects. This is put down to the patient&

I recently attended the Auckland Writers' and Readers' Festival which was abuzz with wonderful creative people capably interviewed by their peers, book stalls piled high with tempting offerings of all kinds and a sense of sharing in the 'thought worlds' of an amazing cross-section of human

A wise colleague, talking about the devastation felt by an abandonned child, gave the analogy of Ground Zero at Hiroshima. I had to smile, partly in recognition of the aptness of the image but also in seeing the possibility of hope. I have been to the epicentre of the nuclear

Walking round the waterfront I smile at the smooth sea tinted faintly pink by the sunset. Two shags are swimming in their separate rings of ripples. Each one dives, barely disturbing the water, and surfaces a long way away from the starting point, moving dive by dive towards the beach

I have Mary Oliver's poem 'The Summer Day' on my noticeboard. I re-read it from time to time. It seems very apt just now when our summer has extended into March and every warm day invites us to make the most of it and enjoy being

My swimming coach chides me gently: 'What I hear most from you is “should” as in “I should be able to do this by now”. Be with what is.' Privately, I think that just shows how I'm affected by lack of oxygen from struggling up and

On my noticeboard is a small square of yellowed newsprint with a note addressed to me: 'Dear Jan, I have this notice on the wall. Hopefully, it will be helpful to you, too. “Compassion for others begins with kindness to yourself.” Mary.' The letters are large and uneven

When my mother bought a new lounge suite she was so pleased with the salesman who helped her find just the right one that, much to his surprise, she went back a week later with a chocolate cake. There was laughter and banter and both people felt good about the

On the first fine weekend in several weeks I've volunteered to take the children's session at our Quaker Meeting. Arriving by bike, enjoying the spring morning, I look around for a theme that would let us get out of the small room where we had held

We are used to the 'glass half full, glass half empty' analogy to refer to optimists and pessimists. It's easy to think of this as a matter of luck - a positive attitude is either in the person's nature ('born that way'

A Buddhist friend sent me this from her daily Dharma quote. It fitted well with some of the ideas I have been pondering and writing about here. Kusulu is a Tibetan term for a yogi or a simple meditator, as opposed to a scholar. WE ALL HAVE GOODNESS The realization

I spent the long weekend, aptly named Labour Weekend, painting my living room. After the first morning, when a kind friend came to help me wash down the walls and gave me a couple of hours of her gentle company, I worked alone. I made a conscious decision to work